Letters #43

Dear Hubby: I know I say thank you all the time for all the thoughtful things you do for me or for us but everyone likes to hear they are appreciated. I do not think there are words out there that convey just how thankful I am for you. Thank you for the dinners you make after a long day at work. Thank you for making my tea even though you dislike the smell of it. Thank you for putting on Pretty Little Liars because you know I am excited to watch it. Thank you for helping with all my craft projects that seem never ending. Thank you for telling me that everything will be okay. I could go on for days. You're awesome!

Dear Friends & Family: Thanks for all the encouragement, phone calls and texts over the past few months. Special appreciation for Hubby, my parents, Brian's parents, Lauren, Aunt Di, Ashley, Chrissy and Rebecca for calling and texting to check up on me. It has really lifted my mood so many times over the last few months.

Dear Surgery & Doctor: Please go smoothly and without any complications tomorrow. Please be thorough and make sure I don't have to do anything like this again. Ever.

Dear Hubblesworth: We have been married for 338 days or approximately 29, 203, 200 seconds. That's a lot of seconds!! I cannot believe that I have been Mrs. Ashley Kozell for more than 11 months already. It really does feel like time is speeding up. Now it is time to start planning for our first anniversary and find just the right gift. Just so you know, the first year is supposed to be paper. And no Husband, a card does not count. ;) I love you to the moon and back.

I have every intention of sharing what has been going on with me. I just haven't found the time because I feel like it will be a long post. What I will say is that I should be okay. It is not life or death.  I apologize for being so vague for weeks. I really have debated on whether or not to share and then how much to share. Then I realized that one of the hardest parts of all this was feeling isolated, like I was the only woman going through this, like something was wrong with me. Then I started talking to people and I realized that so many others had gone through what I was going through. Now that was three years ago and it has progressed to something less common, at least in my friends circles which is why I want to share. I have this tiny blog but if one person reads this and feels like they are not alone or can share with a friend who is going through something similar then that is enough.

I hope you have a great week! I will be going to the hospital at 6am tomorrow and having surgery at 7:30am. Wish me luck!

xo

-AMK-